Abnormal lives, p.16
Abnormal Lives, page 16
Simone shook her head. “No, I’ve got a better idea.”
22
Stefan flipped his cell phone closed and glanced in the direction of Wayne’s table as he scribbled a message on a napkin:
Want the charges dropped? Meet me at the Hyatt hotel, room 223 in two hours.
Stefan gave the napkin to a waitress to pass on to Wayne and hurried out of the restaurant.
He looked at Simone and smiled as he got in the car. “We need a camcorder.”
Stefan lay across the bed in the hotel room on his stomach, wearing a purple corset and a matching G-string. Simone stood in the closet focusing the camcorder on the bed through the opening in the door. Her fingers were crossed. She hoped that Wayne would show up and everything would go as planned. She touched the gun on her side, recalling what Stefan had said when he handed it to her. “Don’t look at me like you don’t know what it is. If something goes wrong up in here, you might have to use it.”
Wayne slid the key card, which was left at the front desk for him, into the door. He walked in, checking out the curves on the body that lay across the bed. He smiled, pleased by what he saw.
Simone’s palms became sweaty and she closed her eyes. Please, please let this work.
Wayne moved closer toward the bed, taking off his shirt and laying it in the chair. Stefan sat up in the bed and stretched, leaning his head back.
Wayne came to a halt, looking at Stefan’s Adam’s apple, noticing how round and prominent it was. He then moved his eyes down to Stefan’s chest, staring wildly as if he was confused. “What the fuck is this?”
Stefan reached his hand out, wanting Wayne to grab it so he could pull Wayne into the bed with him. “Your get out of jail free card.”
Wayne grabbed the phone off of the table beside the bed and threw it at Stefan.
Stefan blocked the phone with his forearm and jumped to his feet. “Nigga, what the fuck is wrong with you?”
“I don’t know what you thought when you wrote your little note but I ain’t no fucking punk!” Wayne shouted, spraying Stefan with saliva.
Stefan wiped the spit from his face. “What I was thinking was you could use a favor.” Stefan smirked. “And from what I heard, you like going in the rear too much not to be.”
“Watch how you come off at me,” Wayne said. “I’ll hurt you.”
Stefan grabbed his clothes off of the bed. “Fuck this; I ain’t about to waste my time standing here arguing with yo’ ass. I’ll put on my clothes and leave.”
Wayne looked at Stefan with disdain in his eyes. “You ain’t hurting me.”
“After they sentence your ass and you get to pulling that time, you’ll wish you’d taken me up on my offer,” Stefan said.
“Do you know who I am?” Wayne asked. “I ain’t fitting to do no time for that bullshit.”
Stefan smirked. “You mean, do I know who you were. Nigga, that shit is old news. With the evidence they have, your fate is as good as sealed. But, on the other hand, if you let me work this out for you, I’ll get her to say everything that happened that night was consensual. It’s y’all usual thing; she likes rough violent sex and that’s how she wanted you to give it to her. Hell, depending on how good you are, I’ll get you a public apology.”
An uncomfortable silence filled the room. Stefan glanced over at the closet, wondering if Wayne agreed to go along with it, was Simone ready, was she able to get a good view of them through the opening in the door, and was she ready to stomach the fact that what he had told her about Wayne was true. Wayne put up such a fight that Stefan started to question whether he was right about Wayne’s sexuality.
Wayne moved closer to him. “What makes you think this would be an option for me?”
“If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t still be here.”
Wayne grabbed Stefan by his arms and threw him down on the bed.
Stefan looked up at Wayne as he unbuckled his pants. Stefan smiled at the sight of Wayne’s erection. “I knew you’d change your mind.”
Wayne let drool fall from his mouth onto his fleshy chocolate tool and began to stroke it with his hand, lubricating it, preparing to enter Stefan. “Shut the fuck up and bend over.”
Simone sat on the couch, twirling a lock of her hair and watching the DVD of Stefan and Wayne as she made copies. She pinched herself. I can’t believe Stefan was right. Why would Wayne be interested in guys? It was hard to believe it was the first time he had been with another man. If he had never considered being with, or had never been sexually active with a man, he wouldn’t have been coerced so easily. A man’s pride is hard to break and when you insult it, you put yourself in harm’s way. They will fight, kill, die over it. So it was hard to believe a jail sentence that wasn’t exactly etched in stone would cause Wayne to go against his morals. Then again, as her grandmother used to say, they don’t make men like they used to.
On the other hand, Wayne seemed too damn comfortable not to have done it before. Nonetheless she took pleasure in having her goal accomplished and prepared to go to the post office where she could have a copy of the DVD mailed to Wayne overnight.
23
Wayne picked up the envelope he had signed for earlier that day. He wondered who it could be from. The sender had only written “guess who” on the envelope and drawn a smiley face beside of it. He debated about opening it. He thought of the possibility of it containing anthrax or something else that may be hazardous to his health. He fiddled with the envelope for a moment, trying to get some idea of what was inside. He felt something round and thin that only took up a small portion of the envelope. Right away, he realized that it was a CD or DVD. He tore open the envelope and pulled it out.
He read the label: Did I ever tell you I always get the last laugh?
Wayne smiled. He knew it was from Simone. He would bet every last cent he had on it. He stared at the DVD for a moment, wondering what could be on it. Why would she have sent it to him? Maybe she had made a recording, ranting and raving about how she knew about what had happened between him and her cousin, enraged about the idea of him giving his dick away again.
Crazy-ass bitch just can’t get over me. Wayne looked in the mirror, flexed his muscles, and then smiled. Shit, I can’t blame her. Just look at me.
Then he thought maybe it was what Stefan had promised. Maybe it was a video of Simone admitting that he didn’t rape her and apologizing to him.
Wayne put the DVD in the player and sat down on his bed to watch it. He grinned with anticipation. He was ready to laugh, ready to see Simone make a fool out of herself. But his grin quickly left his face. There was no yelling, no screaming, no confession, no apology, no Simone; just a lot of panting and him and Stefan going at it. Wayne jumped off of his bed and shoved the TV on the floor, and then stomped it when it didn’t cease playing. He yanked the DVD player out of the wall and slung it into the mirror. He fell down on his bed, holding his chest, trying to calm himself down. He couldn’t believe it. No one was there but Stefan and him. He didn’t remember seeing a camcorder. He couldn’t believe they’d set him up. What was more unbelievable to him was that he fell for it. How could he? He considered himself to be smarter than that. But he let his desire get the best of him. Not his desire to get the charges dropped against him. He had a good chance of that anyway. He had a good lawyer and there was also the maid that had overheard their dispute.
If he couldn’t get the charges dropped, then he would accept a plea. He didn’t care what others thought as long as he knew he didn’t do it. He had done a few things that he was ashamed of during his lifetime but that one wouldn’t go on his conscience. He could honestly say that he didn’t do it. There was no mis-communication between them. She was more than willing. Knowing that she was the type of person who would conjure up such a story to attempt to take away his freedom and ruin his image made him let go of the little bit of guilt he had for the way he’d treated her that night.
It was something about seeing Stefan lying across the bed with the line of his G-string disappearing between his firm hips that had raised a passion in Wayne that he thought he had left behind him and promised himself that he would never acknowledge again.
He was sixteen when the feelings started. He had been friends with Jason ever since they were in first grade but he had never thought of Jason that way until that day on the basketball court. Jason had taken his tee shirt off and poured his bottle of water over his head to cool himself off. It was then that Wayne noticed Jason’s body. He noticed how Jason’s body was different from his and the other guys. Jason’s shoulders were broader and his body robust. His developed chest brought attention to how prominent his nipples were and the way his shorts sat low on his round, chocolate hips aroused Wayne. When Wayne got home that evening, he tried to dismiss Jason’s image from his mind and forget about what he’d felt earlier that day on the basketball court. He thought of all the times they had played together and the times they had fought, trying to convince himself that he only thought of Jason as a friend; a good friend and nothing more.
His memories became twisted as he thought about the wrestling matches they’d had and the fights they’d gotten into. The thought crept into his mind of what may have happened if they would’ve gotten a little closer, or paused for a moment when their eyes made contact, or when one of their genitals accidentally rubbed against the other’s body, and took advantage of the situation. He became aroused and masturbated to relieve himself, hoping it would cure his lust. He was disgusted by his actions so much it nauseated him to even think about it. He decided to avoid Jason and began sitting as far away from him in class as possible. Wayne decided not to go to the basketball court anymore and not to answer Jason’s calls. It worked for about a month.
Wayne missed his bus one Friday evening and decided to walk home from school. Jason pulled up beside Wayne in his car and offered him a ride. At first Wayne declined, not knowing if he could stomach being in Jason’s presence for the ten minutes it would take to get to his house. But Jason was persistent and made Wayne feel foolish, asking him did he plan to cry on his way home or something, and didn’t want anyone to see him. Wayne got in the car, figuring he could find it in himself to deal with Jason for that short period of time. They took a shortcut through the wooded area behind the school that had a dirt road that led to the street that Wayne lived on. After a few seconds of quietness, Wayne started to feel awkward, turned on the radio, and started flipping through the stations.
Jason looked at Wayne and smiled, seeing how dissatisfied he was. “Nigga, what is you doing?”
“Trying to find something to listen to.”
“I’ve got some tapes in the glove compartment.”
Wayne opened the glove compartment, started looking through the tapes, and found one that he’d loaned Jason the year before. It was one of Wayne’s favorites. Jason had told him that he’d lost it and changed the subject every time he asked him to replace it. It wasn’t like Wayne couldn’t replace it himself. It was the principle of the matter.
Wayne held up the tape, showing Jason that he had found it. “I thought you lost it.”
Jason glanced at the tape, reading the title. “Naw, man, that one is mine.”
“Well, it’s mine now.”
“Yeah right,” Jason said. “You better put my shit back.”
“Hey, just think of it as you replacing mine.”
Jason pulled to the side of the road and grabbed for the cassette tape. Wayne quickly put it in his pocket. Jason reached over and grabbed Wayne’s pocket, his hand rubbing against Wayne’s dick.
Wayne grabbed Jason’s hand, removing it from his pants. “Come on, man; stop playing.”
Jason snatched his hand away from Wayne and reached for Wayne’s pocket again. Wayne could feel Jason’s breath on his neck and his dick stood at attention. Wayne became frightened. He was afraid of what his feelings might cause him to do. Wayne shoved Jason into the car door. Jason became infuriated and swung on Wayne, landing a punch on Wayne’s jaw. Wayne wrapped his hands around Jason’s neck and began to choke him. Jason struggled to lift his leg off of the floor and kicked Wayne, but there was not enough room for him to do so. Jason tried to pry Wayne’s hand from around his neck.
Wayne leaned in closer to Jason. “How the fuck you start some shit and can’t even handle yours? I should throw your ass out your own car and make you walk home.”
Wayne’s rage made him want to follow through with his threat but he was captivated by Jason’s eyes; even in rage, they seduced him. He wanted to act on his impulse to kiss Jason but before he could, Jason kissed him and all his reservations disappeared. He caressed Jason’s hips like he had fantasized about. It didn’t take two minutes for them to begin fogging up the windows.
Sweaty, embarrassed, and ashamed, Wayne and Jason were silent the few minutes it took them to get to Wayne’s house. When they pulled up, Wayne didn’t say bye, see you later, or nothing. He got out of the car, slammed the door, and went inside the house, not saying a word to his parents who greeted him when he walked in. He made his way to the bathroom and showered. He scrubbed so hard that his skin became red. He wanted it to go away, what he had done and the sensation he’d felt when he was doing it. He could still hear Jason’s voice in his head. He could still imagine the feeling he’d gotten when their lips had touched.
Wayne could hear his father’s words; his hatred of anyone who wasn’t heterosexual. He could see the scornful look on his father’s face when he said homosexuals shouldn’t be allowed to share the same space with those who weren’t sexually immoral. His father would preach about how homosexuals should be jailed because their crime was one of the worst types, a crime against nature and a crime against God. Wayne’s father always told him that homosexuals infested the world the same way roaches did a home and they shouldn’t be allowed to breathe the same air as everyone else. Wayne’s father thought all homosexuals should be shipped off to the same place they dumped the world’s garbage because they were nothing but trash polluting society. That way they could wallow in garbage until the day they died off and their souls burnt in eternal fire.
As soon as Wayne got dressed, he got a trash bag to put his clothes in. Not wanting to touch his soiled clothes, he wrapped them in a towel, put them in the trash bag, and went outside and stuffed them in the garbage. He went back to his room and knelt down beside his bed and prayed. He spent hours repenting for what he did, crying with a wail that came from deep down in his soul. Afterwards Wayne asked for a sign that he was forgiven and that his soul would not burn in the fire that his father had talked about. He lay in bed crying the rest of the night, afraid of what would become of his soul. He waited for a sign but one never came.
The next morning Wayne’s mother went into his room to wake him up for school. Wayne wouldn’t get up; he just lay there looking at her with his teary bloodshot eyes. Wayne’s mother placed her hand on Wayne’s chest to see if it would rise and fall, to see if Wayne was still among the living. She was relieved that there was still breath in his body but frightened by the way he lay there. Not knowing what to say or do, Wayne’s mother asked him why he wasn’t up and getting ready for school. Wayne didn’t answer. He just lay there, staring blankly as tears fell from his eyes. Wayne’s mother called to her husband, who was on his way out to work.
Wayne’s father came in the room and looked Wayne over. “The boy looks fine to me. Get him up and send him to school.”
Wayne’s mother shook her head. “He ain’t going to school. Something’s wrong with him. Look at him; he’s just lying there, not saying nothing.”
Wayne’s father took off his belt and shook it at Wayne. “Boy, get up ’fore I come over there and get you up myself.”
Wayne didn’t move; he just looked at his father. Wayne didn’t care about his father’s threat. In his mind, his soul would perish in a lake of fire on Judgment Day and he would cease to exist. Nothing his father or anyone could do would hurt him; he was already doomed.
Wayne’s mother called the ambulance and, about ten minutes later, Wayne was being carried out the house on a stretcher.
After a day of running tests on Wayne and examining him, the doctor advised Wayne’s mother that he was suffering from a nervous breakdown and then committed him into a mental institution. Wayne’s mother wondered what had happened to him, what had caused him to lay there speechless and to have a break with reality. Her precious child was in so much misery that she never wanted to see him like that again.
She visited Wayne every week and watched him sit there and stare at her. It was after her tenth visit with Wayne that she went home and sat in her living room and cried. She wondered if Wayne would ever be his energetic, good-natured self again. She longed for him to be able to come home.
Wayne’s mother heard a knock on her door. She dried her tears, went to the door, and cracked it open. Jason was standing there with his head down and his shoulders slouched.
Wayne’s mother took a deep breath, trying to keep her composure long enough to tell Jason that Wayne was in the hospital. She looked at Jason and smiled. “Sweetheart, Wayne isn’t here. He’s in the hospital and won’t be home for a while.”
“I know,” Jason said. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”
“Oh?” Wayne’s mother said, stunned by Jason’s nerve. Who did he think he was? Where did he get the nerve to come over and pry into her family’s business? “What is it that you want to say?”
“What’s wrong with Wayne?” Jason asked. “I mean, does he have some kind of disease or something?”
Her eyes widened. “Little boy, I don’t know who you think you are, coming here and asking me some mess like that. You better do yourself a favor and run on home before you get your feelings hurt.”
